I suck at blogging because it’s hot and a stranger made me run

I’m going to skip all the apologies and reasons for not blogging now, and go right into just blogging. Except, I do have to say that every time I click onto this thing to write, I get all distracted by themes, and trying to make this thing look like I want it to – and I have been completely unsuccessful so far.

But anyway. I can be forgiven for all of that because I just jogged in 98-degree heat. Don’t ask me how those two things are related; I’m just pretty sure that jogging in 98-degree heat is so virtuous that it negates pretty much anything.

See, what happened is I started doing the Couch-to-5K plan. Well, no, let me backtrack. What happened is, four years ago I gained a shitton of weight (a shitton, in case you were wondering, is 42.6 pounds. I think it’s metric). Four years of whining about my weight later, my darling husband gave me an ultimatum. Sick of my constant on-and-off dieting, starting and not finishing Weight Watchers, South Beach, Nutrisystem, etc., he said, OK, we’ll start Weight Watchers again. But if it doesn’t work, that’s it. It’s the last diet we’re doing. EVER. Either we stick to this or we just live fat. And miraculously, we’ve stuck to it. We just finished 16 weeks and I’m down 20 pounds and he’s down almost 30 (the penis, you know, is a powerful weight-loss tool). But the thing about starting a diet when you’re really overweight is that at first, weight comes off pretty easily because you’re just not meant to be holding onto that kind of blubber. But at some point, you have to actually start working at it. Which, sadly, means working out. And since we’d finally cancelled our bloodsucking LA Fitness membership, that left me with two options: the dreaded exercise DVDs or the Great Outdoors . I chose option B  because I just wasn’t ready to cope with Leslie Sansone and Denise Austin yet. Started walking the dogs daily, then started adding in jogs. No real plan, just jogged – well, really slogged (slow jogged) – power-walking senior citizens regularly lapped me. But as with most things, I got bored and lost my inspiration, and also it got really, really, Florida-summer hot and humid.

And then one of the bloggers I follow started doing Couch-to-5K — someone who had admitted to an utter loathing for walking, never mind running. And so, as things happen in this Internet age, a total stranger inspired me to start the C25K program. Because I am not cool enough to have an iPhone or iPod touch with the cool C25K app, I downloaded an old-fashioned podcast and off I went.

So here I am, having just finished Week 2. I am not sure that I’m making any progress, except not having died, which I suppose is a form of progress. I’m a little terrified of Week 3, in which I’m expected to jog for 3 full minutes at a stretch. But since I’ve signed up to do a 5K on Sept. 11, which will be right after the end of Week 8, I’ve got to see it through. I”m really wishing I’d had the good sense to get inspired in November, though.

So … ummm, what was I saying? Oh yeah. I haven’t updated my blog since I swore I was going to start blogging again, two months ago, but it’s OK because I ran for nine minutes in hellacious heat. Yep. That’s my story.


One response to “I suck at blogging because it’s hot and a stranger made me run

  1. One word for you: TREADMILL. I would rather be fat than run in this weather.

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