you may call it gross. I call it ‘enriching my body of knowledge’

I am apparently not the first person to wonder just how much mucus the human body is capable of producing. Not surprising. It’s something you only really wonder about when your nose has seemingly not stopped running for two weeks, three days and 45 minutes. Give or take.

My favorite answer, although not as relevant to my particular situation, is this one. Because don’t we all at some point feel that our body is not really helping us out in the healing process when every cubic centimeter of water one consumes is allocated toward snot production?

I don’t know what I have. I broadly refer to it as “the plague” but honestly, I think it’s more likely allergies. Could allergies follow me from Orlando to Vegas and back? I’m sure it’s possible, when you throw in a plane ride, a stuffed-up ear and near-Arctic conditions in Vegas (it got into the 50s one night!). A closer analysis of the snot reveals it’s the clear, non-green-and-therefore-serious-infection-related type. Not that I want to spend a lot of time closely analyzing snot, but it’s been my constant companion for so long now, I feel I should get to know it better.

I did get all semi-responsible and call to make a doctor’s appointment today (side note: Is it “doctor’s appointment” or “doctors appointment”? My AP style guide does not have an answer to this. “Appointment with the doctor” maybe?) but they seem to close at the convenient hour of noon on Friday. Just as well, really. Last thing I’d want is to be on antibiotics when one of my all-time favorite drinking buddies is coming into town. (Like I said, SEMI-responsible).

So I just took a Benadryl. I still can’t hear out of my left ear, but pretty soon I just. won’t. care.

And so ends today’s dissertation on snot.


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