high anxiety

So I discovered something recently. I am … (drum roll) … a high-stress personality type.

WHAT? I know my dear close friends are asking themselves in shock as they read this. YOU? AMY? NO! The hell you say. You are the most low-stress, low-key, un-stressed-out person I’ve EVER met.

You are all snickering, aren’t you?

Yeah, I know I’m a bit on the high-stress side about things. Most things. Work. Relationships. Dieting. Deciding between the bagel with lox and the lox platter that comes with a bagel at TooJays (seriously, that’s an annoying choice. It’s the same freaking thing, only the platter has more lox, and is $3 more. So it really boils down to, how much lox do I need?)

But in having lunch with my mom and best friend yesterday – two of the most non-stressed, low-anxiety people I know – it was pointed out to me that even if I won the lottery and was able to quit my job, eloped, took a magic diet pill and never had to worry about weight-loss again, and TooJays took the lox platter option off the menu, I would create stress for myself. I knew this – but I never really boiled it down and realied it’s not life. It’s me.

Yeah. I know. I stress about everything and make myself crazy at the best of times. And at times like now, when I have a ton of things going on that legitimately are stressful, I could really drive myself over the edge. Obviously, this is something that needs to be gotten under control.

So I went to Barnes and Noble today, looking for a way to fix myself. But I got so stressed out looking for the right solution. Do I need “Stress Management for Dummies”? Do I need “Finding Happiness”? How about “Coping With Anxiety” or “Chicken Soup for the Soul” or some sort of career happiness guide? Too much, I tell you. I bought a random selection of three books that I will bring with me tomorrow when head to Palm Springs, to spend two nights in a luxury resort at a conference that will be attended by several people I really enjoy seeing. I have two nice dinners planned, lots of people to have drinks with, and I’m waitlisted for an upgrade to first-class. And I’m stressed because – because I’ve created it in my head.

Maybe a good smack upside the head would help relieve some of this anxiety.

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