those annoying holiday jewelry commercials

I HATE those freaking things. They may be the thing I hate most about this time of year.

Seriously. Has anyone ever gotten a surprise jewelry box hidden in a snowman? Or inside a turkey, or whatever ridiculousness they show on those commercials, always with some sort of hip, moody love song playing in the background? I don’t even watch that much live TV and I’ve seen about 5 million of them this month.

And not for nothin’, but I don’t need seven diamonds on a pendant to remind me of the “chain of our love” or whatever nonsense they claim those things symbolize. If they were so significant, would everyone from Kay to Sears be selling them? I haven’t looked, but I’m reasonably sure you could get one at Wal-Mart too, since they seem to sell everything else under the sun these days (those “Wal-Mart is hip, we carry name brands and the bratty teen in your life would LOVE a Wal-Mart gift card” commercials are a whole ‘nother story).

The only chain that has a different theme is the one I hate most: Jared, the Galleria of Jewels. First – that’s the dumbest fucking name for a jewelry store ever, but that, I suppose, is irrelevant. Those “he went to Jared!!!!!” commercials? I’d rather poke my eye out with a seven-diamond chain of love than watch one more of those.

Thank God my darling fiancé understands that electronics are a girl’s best friend. Now, honey – is it a GPS or an XM radio that’s under the tree?

Leave a comment