random ramblings

I am drinking a lovely bottle of Robert Hall chardonnay. I am drinking this because I had a very stressful day. By all reports, stress causes belly fat and grey hair. I have plenty of both. So shouldn’t my company have to pay for some sort of hair coloring and any of my diet plans? Like, the Isagenix I’m about to try (if UPS ever shows up with it)?
This is the other reason I’m drinking wine, because I’m going to do this really sucky 9-day “cleanse” which removes toxins from the body, increases energy, and as a side effect, causes weight loss. Yeah, right, like anybody’s buying this shit for the toxin removal. Now, I reasearched this stuff extensively and even though it seems like a pyramid scheme and a lot of people slam it as “just water-weight” loss – I don’t care. I’ll take 7 lbs of water-weight loss. Christina said it tears up your stomach and the snacks taste like cardboard. Awesome.
So meanwhile, I’m drinking wine and watching Armageddon. Armageddon is one of my “sleeping” movies. This is a really weird thing I have – does anyone else do this? I have certain movies that are guaranteed to make me sleep. While I have a tendency to fall asleep during any movie, there are some that I can turn on, turn the lights off, lie down on the couch and I will be asleep within 10 minutes. These movies are as follows: The Perfect Storm, Blast From the Past, Apollo 13 and Armageddon. The odd thing is, I really like all of these movies. I think there’s something about having a movie playing that I know so well that I don’t have to look at the TV to know what’s going on that allows my brain to relax. And there are very few things that allow my brain to relax, so I’ll take it.
The other thing, of course, is xanax – I love that stuff. I really have to be sparing with it so I don’t get addicted or anything. It’s the greatest thing ever on airplanes, though. One milligram and I’m out for the whole flight. I once flew from San Francisco to Shanghai without ever getting out of my seat with the help of xanax and wine. The best was when I had my lasik surgery – they gave me valium AND xanax. DAMN that was a good night’s sleep.
Speaking of my lasik surgery, can you believe it’s been almost a whole year? I can’t. One year without having to worry about contacts. It’s so great. The greatest thing I ever did. And I’m still testing at 20/20.
Which is really good, coz I can see the TV really clearly, and Steve Buscemi is on it, and I really love him. He’s hot. Which is weird, because he’s actually really ugly. Yet he totally makes my toes curl. Jeff Goldblum, too.
Ooops, wine, glass is empty. Must go refill.

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